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Funny Reads
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Thoughts to Ponder
1. If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented?
2. If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren't people from Holland called Holes?
3. "I am" is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English language. Could it be that "I do" is the longest sentence?
4. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
5. If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled?
6. If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
7. If it's true that we are here to help others, then what exactly are the others here for?
8. Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker?
9. Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with.
10. No one ever says, "It's only a game", when their team is winning.
11. Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a raceccar not called a racist?
12. Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites?
13. Why do overlook and oversee mean opposite things?
14. Why isn't the number 11 pronounced onety one?
15. Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?
16. If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen defrocked, doesn't it follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted, cowboys deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked, and dry cleaners depressed?
17. If Fed Ex and UPS were to merge, would they call it Fed UP?
18. Do Lipton Tea employees take coffee breaks?
19. What hair color do they put on the driver's licenses of bald men?
20. I was thinking about how people seem to read the Bible a whole lot more as they get older, then it dawned on me they`re cramming for their final exam.
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